The thing about love.

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Have I ever told you haw much I love you?
I know that I have said those words thousands times before,
and I said them silently before ever verbalizing them. 

it is such a strange thing, love. 
it is the closest thing to faith, it is so profound, 
you can't see it, but you know it's there. 
I fell in love before you,
with how many people? it's irrelevant, because it's just happened. 
and every time it had been different.  
the same love never happens twice, not with the same two people. 
and that's the beauty of it. 

after my first heartbreak I remember thinking that I don't want to be in love, 
ever again, 
but hearts are wild creatures, they long for the familiarity of love, 
they are meant to love, and they seek purpose. 
the emptiness that filled my heart drained me,
stripped me of my colors. 
I was not dead, or alive, 
just something in between.

until I allowed love to crawl it's way back to my heart, 
until I ran into you, 
a beautiful coincidence, 
better than all the plans I ever made. 

The thing about love is that it changes you, 
in ways possible and unexpected to you, 
you develop new habits, 
and gives you new perspective,
and day by day, you become another version of yourself,
a better one.

that's what happened to me,
every time I fell in love, every time I fell out of love,
every time I promised to push people away and every time I broke that promise,
all that prepared me for you.
so tell me again, have I ever told you how much I love you?

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